Total VeteranWhat Deployment Does to Family Relationships: The Research
Most of the strain deployment puts on a family fades within about eight months of return. Parent-teen tension and parental worry last longer, and combat trauma predicts the most lasting harm.
- RAND found family functioning returned to pre-deployment levels after about eight months of reintegration on average.
- Parent-teen strain and parental worry about children outlasted reintegration in the RAND study.
- Marital satisfaction fell across the deployment cycle, and similar non-deployed couples declined by about the same amount.
- Combat or deployment trauma predicted persistent symptoms and family strain more strongly than separation alone.
- UK cohort data link deployments over 13 months in 3 years with more relationship difficulty.
Deployment strains family life while it lasts, and most of that strain fades within about eight months of homecoming. The two effects that outlast reintegration in the largest US study are tension in the parent-teen relationship and ongoing parental worry about children. The strongest predictor of lasting family harm is combat trauma in the service member, and separation on its own explains much less.
What the RAND Deployment Life Study measured
The RAND Deployment Life Study followed about 2,700 US military families across the deployment cycle, surveying them before, during and after a deployment. RAND's summary article rounds the sample to nearly 3,000 families and reports data collected from 2012 to 2015. The design included similar families who did not deploy, which lets the researchers separate the effect of deployment from the normal ups and downs of family life.
| Phase | What RAND found |
|---|---|
| During deployment | More depression in the deployed service member, more anxiety and single-parenting stress in the spouse at home, and more emotional or behavioural problems in children. Child difficulties worsened as deployment length increased. |
| Reintegration | Family relationships and wellbeing returned to pre-deployment levels after around eight months on average. |
| After reintegration | Teenagers reported a letdown in the relationship with the returning parent. Parents kept a higher level of concern for their children's emotional wellbeing, even long after the deployment ended. |
| Marriage | Marital satisfaction fell across the cycle, and similar couples who did not deploy declined by about the same amount. |
| Combat and trauma | Service members who experienced deployment trauma showed persistent increases in depression, PTSD and anxiety symptoms. Psychological trauma was linked to more marital aggression, and combat strained parent-teen relationships. |
RAND's full report adds a detail that surprises many readers: service members reported a better family environment during deployment than before or after it, possibly because they were away from daily family demands. Spouses reported no significant change in family environment across the cycle. Deployment had no overall significant effect on persistent psychological outcomes for service members or spouses. The persistent effects clustered among members who experienced deployment trauma, and among spouses of members who were physically injured.
What this means for families
The pattern points to three practical conclusions.
- Expect an adjustment period of months. RAND's average of eight months is a reference point. Individual families vary, and RAND quotes spouses whose families took longer to feel settled again.
- Watch teenagers closely. The parent-teen relationship carried the clearest lasting strain, and teenagers reported a letdown in the relationship with the returning parent.
- Treat trauma exposure as the main risk signal. Where a returning parent has combat-related symptoms, the whole family benefits from support early. The article on combat exposure and trauma covers that link in more detail.
Preparation and contact make a measurable difference
RAND found that service members who did more predeployment preparation reported higher parenting satisfaction after deployment. Spouses who prepared more, and who were satisfied with contact during the deployment, also reported higher parenting satisfaction. Communication with other military families during deployment was linked to stronger commitment to service among spouses and teens.
Plan the crossing together
Cohorts help you build a written plan for life after service that you can share with the people at home.
UK evidence
UK research comes mainly from the King's Centre for Military Health Research cohort and from studies built on it. Four findings stand out.
- A study of 7,581 UK military personnel, published as Relationship Difficulties Among UK Military Personnel (Keeling and colleagues, 2015), found that most participants reported no relationship difficulties. Deploying for more than 13 months in 3 years was one of the factors linked to difficulties, alongside childhood adversity, limited partner support, unmarried relationships and financial problems.
- A study of 3,198 serving personnel with children under 18, listed as Perceptions of the impact a military career has on children, found that 51 percent believed their career had a negative impact on their children, 29 percent saw no impact and 20 percent saw a positive impact. Deployment of 13 months or more within 3 years, common mental disorder symptoms and probable PTSD were each linked to a negative view.
- A 2025 study of 219 UK military couples (Gribble, Goodwin and Fear), summarised by the Centre for Evidence Based Early Intervention, found that about four in ten couples had at least one partner meeting the threshold for relationship distress. Partners reporting more PTSD symptoms had lower relationship satisfaction.
- The first report of the UK Veterans Family Study (published 7 September 2022) found that partners of veterans with PTSD were more likely than partners of non-veterans to meet clinical thresholds for depression, anxiety, PTSD and alcohol misuse. It also found that no UK studies focus on adult children of veterans.
Limits of the evidence
The RAND families were almost all veterans of at least one earlier deployment, and the study was sponsored by the US Army's Office of the Surgeon General and the Defense Centers of Excellence, so its results describe US families who already knew the routine of a deployment cycle. UK studies draw on a cohort surveyed between 2007 and 2009, during the Iraq and Afghanistan campaigns, and rely on self-reported relationship measures. Neither body of work follows families after the service member leaves the forces, which is why the UK Veterans Family Study is still collecting data from veterans, partners and adult children.
Where to get help
The right route depends on the question. Practical and policy questions suit the Families Federations. Welfare, relationship and crisis support suit the charities and health services listed here.
| Organisation | What it offers | Contact |
|---|---|---|
| Army Families Federation | Independent, confidential advice for Army families (Regular and Reserve) on housing, money, education, health, employment and family life. | Contact form at aff.org.uk/contact |
| Naval Families Federation | Confidential, independent support for Royal Navy and Royal Marines families, including overseas assignments, family life and leaving the service. | 023 9265 4374, contactus@nff.org.uk |
| RAF Families Federation | Information and guidance for RAF families, with a dedicated deployment section and a Leaving the RAF section. | 01780 781650 |
| SSAFA | Welfare support for the families of all armed forces personnel and veterans, including domestic abuse outreach and bereavement groups. | Forcesline 0800 260 6780 (Mon to Thu 09:00 to 17:00, Fri 09:00 to 16:00) |
| Military OneSource (US) | Free counselling for individuals, couples and families, plus spouse and parenting resources. Available to service members and families for 365 days after separation or retirement. | 800-342-9647, 24 hours |
| VA Vet Centers (US) | Individual, group, marriage and family counselling in a non-medical setting for eligible veterans, service members and their families. | 1-877-927-8387, 24 hours |
The UK veteran charities guide and the US guide on who to call list wider options.
UK: call Samaritans free on 116 123 (24 hours), or the Combat Stress helpline on 0800 138 1619 (24 hours, text 07537 173683). Veterans in England can contact the NHS Op COURAGE service through the regional numbers on the NHS Op COURAGE page. US: dial 988 then press 1 for the Veterans Crisis Line, or text 838255. Family and friends can use these lines too.
What to do this week
- Plan contact and homecoming expectations with your partner before the deployment starts.
- Give teenagers a say in how routines change when the returning parent comes home.
- Allow several months for the household to settle and review how it is going at eight months.
- Contact your Families Federation or SSAFA Forcesline on 0800 260 6780 if the strain continues.
- If combat-related symptoms affect home life, ask NHS Op COURAGE for an assessment or, in the US, a VA Vet Center.
Questions people ask
How long does it take a family to readjust after deployment?
Does deployment cause divorce?
How does deployment affect children?
Who can UK families contact about deployment support?
- RAND Corporation, "The Resilience of Military Families" (2016). https://www.rand.org/pubs/articles/2016/the-resilience-of-military-families.html
- RAND Corporation, "The Deployment Life Study: Longitudinal Analysis of Military Families Across the Deployment Cycle", RR1388 (2016). https://www.rand.org/pubs/research_reports/RR1388.html
- Keeling et al., "Relationship Difficulties Among UK Military Personnel", Marriage and Family Review 51(3) (2015). https://uwe-repository.worktribe.com/output/842754
- UWE Bristol repository, "Perceptions of the impact a military career has on children". https://uwe-repository.worktribe.com/OutputFile/810930
- Centre for Evidence Based Early Intervention, summary of Gribble et al. and Scalco et al. (2025). https://www.centreforevidence.org/news/20250806-new-research-has-explored-relationship-satisfaction-among-military-couples-and-personnel-veterans
- Forces in Mind Trust, "First report published from UK Veterans Family Study" (7 September 2022). https://www.fim-trust.org/news-policy-item/first-report-published-from-uk-veterans-family-study/
- RAF, "New families deployment resource". https://www.raf.mod.uk/serving-families/raf-serving-families-news/new-families-deployment-resource/
- SSAFA, "Military families". https://www.ssafa.org.uk/get-help/military-families
- Naval Families Federation. https://nff.org.uk
- Military OneSource. https://www.militaryonesource.mil
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